I consider many of the stories I write are a prophecy of things to come. I believe this because I believe in the quantum of quantum physics.
There is a possibility of many parallel Universes in existence at the same time. They are completely identical except for the outcome. Within this line of thinking, I become responsible for my future and its outcome.
For me the quantum part means that I see quantum physics as if it were two parts: the unknown magical part, quantum and the physical part, science, known as physics.
All new concepts and discoveries are not believable at first. However, over time these ideas gain credence. I have my reasons to believe that I am one of many who have a glimmering about the magical part of quantum.
I believe that some of these multi-universes operate in the realm of the supernatural as we are becoming, however rudimentary, to understand. The realm of the spirit world of angels, demons, souls and spirits. The all-knowing Universe that I write about.
Peg was my lifeline, analogous to the ‘line’ in my story, The Tight Wire.
Peg saved me by being my ‘line,’ which I held onto for dear life. Alas, she was also my safety net, which allowed me to take chances and walk a different line. With her I was able to constantly, but carefully, step outside my safety zone.
With Peg’s passing, my lifeline wire is fraying.
I believe Peg’s arrival in my life was by design, design of my own making, a quantum design, not the responsibility of my beloved Universe. I am prophesying my own future in the way I conduct my daily life and, in my thinking, and writing. I simply do not know the outcome in advance.
Now that Peg is on her next Journey, my lifeline is no longer connected to any substance. I am falling.
I am desperately trying to find my way without the aid of any light; falling through an endless void with no compass. My Angel is not there to illuminate my way, she is there only to help me complete my earthly journey, no matter what the ending will be.
In my story, I Make my Future, I address my own need to make my future by envisioning many quantum outcomes. The one I choose will be the way life goes for me.
There is no bottom to my fall this time; this is it. I am prepared to join Peg, or make a different outcome.
Excerpts from some of my stories are set below. I leave it to you to see the intimate connection of the words, which are there only, because as a writer, I am compelled to write the chain of words even if I do not understand them and their connection with the future.
Excerpts from The Tight Wire
There was less than a thousand feet to go. The wire was heating up, the grease working itself out between the fine strands. During all the years he had spent learning, he found the wire had a life of its own, telling him everything, telegraphing its feelings through the buffalo hide soles of his slippers. But now, the wire was telling him it was dying.
Prepared in France, the wire was the finest of its kind, very strong, attention had been paid when it was woven. As always, he had supervised the rigging for this walk, spending hours going from side to side checking the tension and the security of the anchors. This change in temperature was unexpected. He had waited for three days for overcast, cool weather, with no wind. Halfway through, the sun broke through the clouds and warmed the wire. Had the gods parted the clouds to peer down at his walk? The tightwire began to slacken from the heat; a fresh breeze made balance difficult. He must have offended the gods; one cannot walk wire without the consent of the gods.
Walking was the province of the gods. You must always be in grace with the gods because only they prevented your fall.
Wallenda fell in South America, they said he didn’t supervise the rigging. He had offended the gods by calling it, `The Last Great Walk.’
He had been afraid before. At first, he felt paralyzed, his legs turned to lead, he stopped and balanced. The braided wire dropped one inch; the ends of his pole deflected up one inch. He began to walk and then run across the tightwire, the weight of 38 years of life left his body. He was light; he flew across a wire that was no longer pressed against the callused, godless soles of his feet.
When I wrote these words, I intuitively knew my life was intertwined with Peg. If Peg passed, my lifeline would become unraveled. How would I be able to exist without her?
Excerpts from I Make My Future
My future does not exist until I do something to move from my present energy place to some other energy place.
Tomorrow is an empty place. It doesn’t exist until I fill it. I can fill tomorrow with today or I can fill tomorrow with something new.
I have the power to change tomorrow by changing the energy of tomorrow by my greatest power, my thoughts.
This is my example of the power of Quantum thought. I think it, so it will be. My current state of grief is causing me great mental and physical harm.
My conundrum: here, with Peg’s infinite living energy around me and finish out my life on earth, or leave my earthly life now and join Peg in completeness in the Universe.
I believe in Life after Death but still, while currently falling through the void, I must find a reason to want to stay here. Only with that reason will I be able to arrest my fall.
Excerpt from Life after Earthly Death
It is said: physicist Stephen Hawking’s believed that after death, we simply turn to dust. If I believe his teachings and I have something important to contribute, I need to contribute it now. Or, is there an alternative?
Apparently, Hawking’s also believed that the Universe and Time all began at the same moment, the moment of the Big Bang: a theory that is all his science can prove, so in a way, as great a thinker as he was, he was held hostage by his science.
Personally, I am not held hostage because I do not need to prove anything and I have a different understanding of Time. Although rarely discussed, Time is the important part of the puzzle. The Big Bang was 13.8 billion years ago: an unfathomable period of Time for a human, but perhaps a mere blip in the life of a spirit or an Angel.
My explanation and knowledge of Time is why I know I will be back. I won’t need to wait another 13.8 billion years, because new Universes are created all the time. Other Universes are running concurrently with ours. Everything I do, say, or write is flowing into the other Universes as wisdom.
I am here, and there, in the same moment, but nevertheless, different. My contribution is made now, here, and in a different Universe concurrently. My spirit is in multiple Universes at once. I know.
Two doors in front of you stand closed.
Which to take? One enters on the realities of life, atomic dirt and strife.
The very thing you now despise.
The other enters upon your dreams, mystic clear and clean.
The very thing you idolize.
Now you must decide.
Each is clearly marked.
Some will choose the door marked life, to conquer all its dreadful stink,
and by winning self-esteem find the door marked dreams.
Some will open the other door and through the power of their dreams,
gain the strength to stand before the door marked life.
Some will exist forever, their hand outstretched into the air, and never open either door.
They will need no life, nor have no dreams.
The point: I find it is possible for me to live in the boundary between the multi-universes. I only know I live in this boundary after I read what I write, otherwise I consider my existence in this boundary normal and realistic and not magical thinking. My wish is that the above explanation will give you new insight into my thinking and how I believe I make my way through life by living the ending in advance. I will, therefore I am.